1 SENTENCE SUMMARY: Eight Dates is a compassionate guide to navigating the complexities of relationships, helping couples to build and sustain healthy, meaningful connections.
“Love is an action, not a feeling. It is a choice to prioritize the connection between two people.”
Quick Info

Category: Relationships
Publish Date: 2019-02-05
# Pages: 224
ISBN: 1523504463
Where to Get It:
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Table of Contents
Overview
John Gottman’s book, Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, is an accessible guide to strengthening relationships through thoughtful dialogue.
Gottman, a professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Washington, is a legendary couples counselor who has studied relationships for over 40 years.
Through his research, he has identified eight essential conversations couples should have to ensure a strong, healthy relationship.
In Eight Dates, Gottman provides couples with a blueprint for discussing and resolving issues, deepening emotional connection, and finding common ground.
With step-by-step instructions, exercises, and personal anecdotes, Gottman gives readers the tools and confidence to navigate difficult conversations and strengthen their relationships.
4 Key Lessons from Eight Dates by John Gottman
1. Understand the Different Love Languages
The book Eight Dates by John Gottman introduces the concept of “love languages”
different ways people express and receive love.
Gottman outlines five love languages
words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, physical touch, and receiving gifts
and encourages couples to learn what their partner’s love language is, and how to use it to strengthen their relationship.
Understanding the different love languages can help couples better understand each other, express their love in a way that is meaningful to their partner, and create a stronger connection.
2. Make Time to Connect
Gottman encourages couples to make time to connect on a deeper level.
He suggests carving out time to really talk, listen, and learn more about each other.
This can help couples strengthen their bond and better understand each other’s needs and feelings.
3. Practice Fighting Fair
Gottman emphasizes the importance of learning how to fight fairly.
He suggests couples avoid criticism and blame, focus on the issue at hand, and use “I” statements rather than “You” statements.
By practicing these skills, couples can work together to resolve conflicts in a constructive manner.
4. Keep Your Relationship Fresh
Gottman encourages couples to keep their relationship fresh and exciting.
He suggests going on regular dates, trying something new together, or doing an activity that one partner particularly enjoys.
This can help couples stay connected and keep their relationship from becoming stagnant.
Who Should Read It
This book is best suited for couples who are in a committed relationship and are looking to strengthen their connection and communication.
It is also a great resource for couples’ therapists and coaches who are helping couples develop better communication skills.
Where to Get It
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About John Gottman
John Gottman is an American marital and family psychologist who has written a number of books and articles on relationships.
He is best known for his work on the Gottman Method, an approach to couples therapy which focuses on improving communication and problem solving skills.
He has been featured in Time Magazine, The New York Times, and The Wall Street Journal.
John Gottman’s book Eight Dates is a practical guide to reconnecting with your partner and rekindling your relationship.
It includes exercises and activities that couples can do together to strengthen their bond and improve their communication.
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Other Relationships Books you may Like:
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- Fed Up by Gemma Hartley
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- Getting The Love You Want by Harville Hendrix
- Guide to Getting It On by Paul Joannides
Over to You
If you already read Eight Dates by John Gottman, please take a moment to rate it and maybe write your feedback in the comments. You’ll help other readers make the best choice.
Thanks a lot,
Simon

Welcome to DailyBitsOfWisdom.com, my passion project inspired by my own battle with depression. Here, I share resources on journaling, positive affirmations, self-help insights, and book summaries, creating a nurturing space where we can connect, learn, and grow together on our journey to self-discovery and personal growth.